LL and I were at the beach on Monday. Sunday night, I went to sleep early so I didn't see that they all watched one of those crime shows about a wife poisoning her husband. "It smelled like almonds, almonds were the first clue". Well, when I got up and I vaguely heard Kris and LL talking about almonds, it reminded me of something I bought LL for Valentines day. So I go and get the bag of sugar free, milk chocolate covered almonds and handed it to him. Oh the howling coming out of Kris's and LL's mouths. I guess he thought it might be his last day on earth. But still, I gave him a gift. I resisted extending my arms out to receive my chocolates, flowers or what ever else I was sure awaiting me for Valentines day. Nothing came my way. After that, LL and Steve left us to go home. That evening, LL called to say he made it home and that my Valentines gift was delivered and he was installing it. I asked what? He said something like this. "Honey, nothing says lovin like...............(wait for it)................(wait for it!)............. a clean butt. Happy Valentines day, you have a bidet."
Now for most women, this would be a huge insult. But for someone like me, who's bottom goes through more torture than the average lady, I was tickled. (More ways than one).
So for this Rectal Cancer Survivor, I am proud to say I am the owner of a Blue Bidet. Yes! Yes I am that warped and happy.
Thank you my love for about the best Valentine gift anyone ever received.
You really have to live with me to understand.